Tuesday, January 26, 2010

7 weeks and counting...

Warning: If you are still in the throes of wanting desperately to adopt from foster care (like I was, oh, a year ago), this post might piss you off.

So, it's been 7 weeks since Brooklyn's mom has been in touch. I'm so sad for her. And so scared for us, and the decision that we could / might / may / probably will have to make about her long term future.

Don't get me wrong, we love her to do death and if there were no other factors to consider but her, we would be more than happy to adopt her. But there are external constraints now. Like my other two daughters, and the prospect of raising three children (three GIRL children) that are less than 15 months apart. Logistically this will get easier with time. All three are walking and 1.5 kids are out of diapers which has made a big difference. But in the long term, I just keep thinking how EXPENSIVE it will be - to have three girls who all need prom dresses or three college tuition bills... the list goes on and on.

And I also wonder about having Lucy and Brooklyn in the same grade at school. That seems weird, since they're not twins. Oh yeah, and the fact that we wanted to foster for a while before adopting again, which probably, realistically, won't be possible because I don't think we'd want to try four for a long, long time. I don't know.

Anyway, that's what my head has been spinning around lately. Any of you out there have kids who are very close in age and have any thoughts?

Monday, January 11, 2010

Anybody still out there?

If so, I'm sorry.

This is the longest I've gone without posting since I started my blog. I guess I could attribute it to 1) the added chaos of a third child - I mean really, who knew? 2) the added chaos of my job which is getting crazier by the second - Again, really, who knew? and 3) the holidays - during which time i visited a lot, got to hang out with two of my dearest friends a little and did not mail the cards and pictures I bought. Awesome.

So, where were we? Let's just do updates, shall we?

Me: I recovered from the big horrible, bad work fuck up. Mostly. Am paranoid as shit about doing it again, which is probably a good thing. Have been converted to a believe in better living through chemistry. Ahem. And am settling into a groove, I think.

PB: Great, laid back and uber-supportive. An all around too good partner that I don't really deserve but who makes me believe in karma. As in I did something amazingly good to deserve getting him this go around.

Lily: Also, great. Almost three!!! Very busy. She loves tumbling, the new indoor trampoline and princesses, all things princess.

Lucy: Yeah, I'll go with great here as well. Almost two, talking like mad. I don't even know how I got two kids who are so freaking verbal (and the fact that PB has to live with us and my aforementioned belief karma make me wonder what the hell he did in a former life, but I digress). She just learned how to crawl out of her crib last Thursday - and we knew this because she knocked on our bedroom door, said "I wake" and when I answered the door, she beamed at me and said "I outta my cib momma". Yeah, pretty adorable.

Brooklyn: Also great. Has made tremendous strides in the last 3.5 months and we're SO proud of her. She's walking, trying really hard to talk without too much success, has gained pounds and is beginning to throw some serious tantrums. Which pretty much sucks, but I think it ultimately actually a good sign.

As for Brooklyn's case, well, her mom had been pretty consistent about visiting, and even had me halfway convinced for a while that it was a big misunderstanding. Turns out not so much. Let's put it mildly by saying she has made some really terrible life decisions in the last month and hasn't seen Brooklyn at all during that time. Really not sure where this case is headed, but pretty sure we might be facing a major decision in the next year. One that, honestly, I'm not that excited about making.

So what about you? If there is a you to speak of anymore?