Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The big reveal (photos removed)

Allow me to introduce you to Lily (my middle name) (biological last name) (PB's last name):


Monday, August 24, 2009

T minus two days and counting

In less than 36 hours, this whole ordeal should be over. Keep your fingers crossed that no one forgot to submit key paperwork, regarding you know, our training hours or where we store our cleaning products :-)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

A whirlwind of activity

So, Tuesday at 4pm, one of our clients decided they wanted to hold focus groups, this Saturday and Sunday.


I've spent the last two days organizing a (IMHO) logistical miracle in that a) the groups will actually happen and b) I will actually be there.

But, those are some of the most expensive one way tickets I've ever booked in my life.

Friday, August 07, 2009

Ears - additional info and Sorry!!

So I had no idea that I wouldn't get an email when there was a comment needing moderation. I clicked over here to test it out and realized there were many comments for me to approve. Sorry about that.

Re: Lily's ears. First, she is not adopted yet, so nothing can happen until then. But she's been asking and asking and her adoption day is August 26th - you know, hopefuly unless the agency fucks somthing up, which really? would not be that surpsing. Anyway, there is a possibility that the ear piercing could be tied in as a sort of celebratory, yay, finally ours, thing.

Second, I am not really worried about the cleaning / maintenance thing. I'm more than happy to do that (see below).

Here is my general pros / cons kind of list:

  • Doing it now means I handle cleaning and maintenance, which I think will work better (unless we put it WAY off, which I know I won't happen. I couldn't really say no to her for another 10 or 12 years)
  • Doing it now means she will likely not remember it, if it is a nasty experience, or at least not the details.
  • She wants earrings. A lot.
  • She wants earrings, "like momma's" which, I'm not gonna lie, melts my damn heart.
  • I have to admit I think it would look flippin' adorable.

  • Um. The pain. There's that.
  • Am concerned about her messing with the earrings - not in a pull them out kind of way, but more in a wow, these are so cool I wanna touch 'em kind of way
  • If she does this, I know Lucy will want to as well. I am uncomfortable about piercing a child who doesn't really know what they are having done, but I know how things work around here and Lucy would want earrings if Lily has them. Plus, Lucy would also look REALLY FREAKIN' CUTE with earrings. And if I'm going to take care of both their ears, I'd rather be doing it both at the same time.
  • Let's face it, as brilliant as I think my kid is, I don't think she can REALLY understand earpiecing and give any kind of consent. Yes, we've told her it means holes in her ears and yes we've told her it will hurt, but she doesn't really GET it. Is it wrong to make a decision like that for her?
  • The right of passage idea - since my ears were pierced when I was like 18 months old, this didn't occur to me, but is a really cool thought.
  • The gender thing: What I was writing here is enough for its own post. Suffice it to say I am not sure how much I want to confirm the "Look pretty! Wear jewelry and makeup and ruffles" message that girls get in our culture, but I also don't want to tell her she can't do that. Just that she should only do that if she wants to.
I know I'm overthinking this, but hello? We've met before, right? If we do go ahead, I think the both ears at one time thing is a good idea. I also have to figure out if they make "purple" earrings in surgical stainless steel.

Thursday, August 06, 2009


Lily has told me, repeatedly and in no uncertain terms that she wants earrings, like mine. At first she specified pink ones but now she wants purple. Stick on stickers were not enough. This child is convinced she wants her ears pierced.

I told her it would hurt. She responded "A little bit, Mama". She is undeterred.

Thoughts on early ear piercing? Not something I EVER thought I would do. But she's asking. BTW, I'm sure if Lily gets hers done Lucy is soon to follow - that's just how things work around here.

Monday, August 03, 2009

Putting yourself where?

So I have been thinking a lot lately which is always a dangerous thing (and probably the byproduct of literally our first free, at-home weekend all summer). This means I may have some things to post about. No guarantees expressed or implied about whether they will be interesting.

Anywho... so I'm sitting in fat class today (that's my term for the weight loss program that PB and I are participating in, somewhat successfully) and while I was busy trying not to puncture my eardrums with my pencil (due to the rambling old ladies talking about canning and third husbands and wrinkles assocated with their lady bits) (no really, I'm not kidding, I wish I were) I did manage to hear one message loud and clear.

You've got to put yourself first.

Errm. Yeah. Let me be the first (haha) to say that I have, in the past, been seriously into putting myself first. In fact, that's one of the main reasons why I used to think I would be a terrible mom. I was very into myself and had firmly planted myself at the top of my own priority list. There really wasn't room for a wriggly, squirmy, pile of need that cried and also couldn't use the bathroom independently (maybe that explains why PB loves our dog more than me - poor Gibby was acquired in the middle of the me phase).

So there have definitely been times when I put myself first. And there still are. But as rule, time for myself is pretty much nowhere near the top of the list when it comes to my day-to-day life. Rather, it is kind of my scheduling buffer. In other words, when there is time and when I can think of something to do for myself I do it, but normally this is really the only liquid part of my schedule and it gets consumed by the suck of the vacuum that is the rest of my life. Not suck in a crappy sense. Just in the busy, efficient, Dyson-vacuum that never loses suction sense.

The astute reader surely asks: If it's about time how come you would have (easily) qualified for fat class back when you weren't working full time?

That's where motivation comes in. I am pretty motivated at this point. I want to be healthier and I have learned that that is very unlikely to happen for me through eating alone. I just don't like a wide enough variety of foods to live for long periods of time eating only healthy stuff. So I need to work out and I want to work out (a lot of the time). I just came to the realization well after I lost the flexibility I used to have in my schedule.

According to everyone in my class, working out will happen when I put myself first, and schedule time for myself and stop taking care of other people.

But I don't really know how to do that, or if I even want to. I have to have a full-time job from a financial perspective and beyond that, I value my career. It comes with a typical schedule which takes 40 hours of potential me time a week, at best and 65 hours a week when things are busy. Weekdays are pretty much non starters when it comes to squeezing out more time - the only option is really to wake up earlier (which, hello? anyone who has seen me on less than 7 hours sleep KNOWS that's a bad idea).

And the other part of the current equation is my time at home. I honestly don't have any desire to take more time away from my family. I don't mind there not being as much me time anymore. I've willingly put my two mini-mes there instead. In fact, being around them is purely selfish, I love (almost) every minute of it, and so in some sense, it IS me time.

But it's not workout time, and that's the rub. I don't know how to make working out feel important enough to leave the girls during the four hours per weekday when we are both awake at the same time. I think I may have to bit the bullet and condition myself to be a morning person.

Anyone up for 5am cardio and yoga with a bitch? Cause that's most definitely what I am at 5 in the morning.